It is completely unbelievable to me that I'm more than a year Quit. I've been going through some pretty intense job interviews lately and can't deny that smoking thoughts haven't been far behind, but they're behind me nonetheless. Having said that, I remind myself as needed that "every day is day one" when beating any addiction.
My Quit showed me how strong it is this afternoon. I was in meetings all afternoon with two very good friends and B2B clients of mine that I sometimes collaborate with. One of the gentlement smokes. He did smoke only outside, and just as I would have done when I was a smoker, he backed away from everybody as he puffed on his sickarette. At first I was a little scared of the situation, but then I began to feel badly for him...
That's how it is for smokers. You have to step back five paces from your friends and loved ones if you're a smoker. You have to worry about how you smell and whether your second hand smoke is giving somebody you love cancer or not. You worry whether your smoke is burning somebody else's eyes or making them sneeze. You worry about whether people really want to be near you or not.
So, all the while you're smoking, you also distance yourself emotionally. Because all of that hurts, regardless of how deeply you may be able to bury it. The reality of it is still there. And if a smoker doesn't care enough about their loved ones to think of these things - I feel doubly badly for them. How blind we are when we are addicted. How little we realize and how much we have to face later, when the blindfold of our substance abuse is swept from our eyes.
Wish me luck on the job interview! This could be the "domino that starts the domino effect" in terms of our lives improving by leaps and bounds.
