I've know I've written about my BL (Baby Love or Big Lug, depending on the day) being a big movie buff - and of course, one of the most topical movies for Americans right now would be Independence Day, or ID4. And I hope you're not too sick of hearing me talk about the professional pyrotechnic (fireworks) shows that we put together, choreographed to music. Knowing that, it's likely no surprise to most of you that I'm up to my eyeballs in getting our big 4th of July show ready to go.

This is my first 4th of July smoke-free, and all the time I've been working on these various tasks (travel arrangements, hotels, catering for 3 days on the field, etc.) I've been thinking about how the movie Independence Day and the 4th of July holiday relate to the past 174 days of my life.

In the movie ID4, a fleet of huge spaceships is covering major cities all over the world. This fleet is governed by one "mothership" (of course) and the purpose is to take over the planet and subjugate the populace. In order to accomplish this, the aliens use the Earth's own technology against it. It uses Earth satellites to communicate and to run a timer which, when it reaches zero, will end life on the planet for most humans. Of course, the protagonists find the method of gunning down the aliens and using their technology to win against them (turn-about is fair play, after all) and the world unites in the common goal of eradicating the enemy aliens from our little corner of the universe.

Thinking about my Quit, it seemed (especially on D3) that there was one guiding force, my own Inner Addict personified as the Nicodemon, attacking me from several different directions (fleet of ships) - and they did indeed use my own thoughts against me. We nicotine addicts eventually learn how to find out how these attacks are coordinated and use our Inner Addict's own strategies to defeat its deadly, insistent voice. Because our inner addicts are very subtle - very sneaky and very clever. But that's what we're all doing - finding how to use every resource available to us to stop responding to the Nicodemon's deadly siren song.

There's a quote in that movie I just love. The president has been poorly advised by his secretary of defense throughout, and he's fed up with it. Completely fed up. He says,

"The only mistake I ever made was to appoint a sniveling little weasel like you Secretary of Defense. However, that is a mistake, I am happy to say, that I don't have to live with. Mr. Nimzicki... you're fired."

As smokers, we let our Inner Addicts make the decisions that are supposed to defend us. As recovering addicts, we realize.. that's a mistake we don't have to live with! What a comforting thought!

And if you look at the Q, well it's pretty plain to see. A whole world of people *are* united against this one deadly foe. Right here, right now.

The 4th of July holiday itself (without getting political) is about self-governing. About not having the life taxed out of the economy. About directing our own growth, making our own choices and not being forced to live by rules we don't agree to live by. How much more perfect a description can there be of gaining freedom from smoking? As addicts, we aren't governing our own behavior. Our finances and our bodies are literally taxed to death (both by the Nicodemon and the monetary taxes) and our growth, spiritual, emotional and even physical, is stinted because we are chained to our addiction. So instead of thinking that we are slaves, living by the choices of others, we fool ourselves into believing we "enjoyed" smoking and that the choice to smoke is okay.

As smokers, we lived by rules we would never agree to live by if we could see the truth of what we were doing. If a child in your family came home and told you that the teacher said they had to go into a gas chamber for ten minutes at a time, every half hour or so, and breathe the fumes in... or that they had to handle fire every half hour, regardless of if it burned their clothing, or hair... or that the principal made them ingest a substance every 20 minutes that was guaranteed to reduce the circulation in their bodies, which could result in a loss of limbs, and reduce the circulation of oxygen through their lungs and bodies, putting their hearts and their lungs at risk -- which one of us would say,

"Oh yes - those are the rules we live by!"???

When you go through those first months of a Quit, you're pretty much only aware of the struggle, of trying to just make it through the day... trusting and praying that what other people tell you is right. That it gets better. That soon it won't be so difficult. That eventually, you'll forget to miss smoking. That in the near future, you'll be glad you went through the hell of smoking cessation. Then one day you realize... that trust wasn't misplaced. You can see what smoking really is and what it really does. You realize you have won a battle for your own freedom - that it isn't just a bunch of ramblings from some overly dramatic person who has become too involved with an online community.


You really are free.

The battle is longer for some than others. And, sadly, not everybody wins the war. But we can all unite to fight the alien. (Because, face it... smoking is alien to our bodies.) We can keep trusting and keep stepping out in faith that one day, one sweet beautiful day it will all be worth it, we'll understand how bad a hold the drug had on us and how well worth the fight it was to get free.


It's so worth the fight.

This 4th of July, I'm going to pick out the biggest, prettiest firework shell we have on our show (the biggest we can shoot due to distance restrictions is a 6 inch shell) and write a dedication on it. That shell will be dedicated to every one of you here at the Q. It will be dedicated to our fight to win our freedom, to those who help along the way, and to those we have each helped as well. To those who have fought the battle and won, to those currently still fighting, and to those who might one day try the fight themselves. To those who run the site, and those who volunteer their time and energy, day after day and night after night to tending the bonfire and all the other wonderful daily and nightly events.

I have never been more thankful in my life for my life and for my freedom than I am this 4th of July. Please - this year, when you watch a fireworks show, know that one shell is ours. It's dedicated to us. I'll get a picture if I'm able.

.·:**:·.·:*¨*:·.·:Happy Independence Day to us all:·.·:*¨*:·.·:**:·.